I can’t believe how long it’s been!! I completely disappeared for months! It all started with frequent hunger. Then nausea, extreme fatigue, vomiting……

And you guessed it- Preggers!

I don’t function well when I’m pregnant. I feel really sick for the first few months. Stomach flu sick. Then the fatigue and baby brain settle in, rendering me completely useless.;)

All things optional are thrown out the window, including blogging of any kind.

But, I’m back! And all the difficult days were entirely worth it! Gabby became a big sister in March, to a new baby brother named…

Logan Robert

He is the sweetest little guy and we all just love him to pieces!! Such a precious gift!!

Gabby has been very good with baby Logan for the most part. She does have her moments…but don’t we all?? :)

Where do I even begin to catch you up on everything going on with Gabby?!

Let’s start at the very beginning:




A positive pregnancy test and you add another face to the family portrait. You mentally install another carseat in the maxed out mini van. You set another place at the table. You order another stocking to hang from the mantle.

From the moment you discover that a new life is being knit together, expectations abound.

You hear the galloping heart beat and see four tiny limbs fluttering about. Your child is running on the playground; chasing after a soccer ball.

You learn the baby is a girl. She’s dancing, twirling, tossing her hair through the air. She’s pushing baby dolls that quickly turn into grandchildren, as your vision speeds through all the wonderful years ahead.

Your daughter is born with ten tiny toes, chubby cheeks, and bright blue eyes. She’s taller and thinner now…all in white, carrying a beautiful bouquet.

Your sweet girl is cooing and smiling at you. What will be her first word? When will she crawl?

Your baby is peacefully nursing and suddenly,

without warning,

every expectation is erased.

Seizures. Catastrophic Epilepsy. Medically Refractory. Cortical Dysplasia. Brain Surgery. Mental Retardation. Dependence. Mentally Delayed. Physically Challenged.

The labels are numerous.

You’re mourning the loss of the child you had imagined. The child you had expected.

You bargain, you question, you beg…

And God responds:

Trust Me. All things work together for good to those who love Me, to those who are called according to My purpose.

Lord, I believe; help my unbelief.

You surrender it all. Every hope, Every dream, Every assumption. The slate is wiped clean.

But Lord, How can this be good?

Be still and know that I am God.

Lay down your pen child. I am the Author of this story

And now, four years later, you begin to see the beauty of a slate that has been wiped completely clean.

You begin to see the beauty of surrender.

Because as promised, a good and wondrous thing happens…


Everything becomes a gift.

And here are the amazing and wonderful gifts God has chosen to fill our precious Gabrielle’s slate with:

- Gabby is the sweetest, most affectionate little girl.

- She’s so quick to smile and laugh.

- She LOVES books.

- She’ll find a bookshelf and sit in front of it for hours flipping through pages.

- Gabby loves: macaroni and cheese, cereal, pizza, yogurt, cheese and crackers, apples, chocolate milk, sweet tea, chicken nuggets, grilled cheese, and SUGAR! Anything else is risky.

- Gabby has 4 “best friends” at school.

- Gabby knows her colors, numbers 1-10, alphabet, and shapes.

- Gabby enjoys watching Dora, Caillou, Diego, and Leapfrog.

- She loves playing dollhouse, kitchen, and dolls with her sister Makinley.

- Gabby holds a pencil correctly and is able to make horizontal and vertical lines, circles, crosses, and is working on triangles.

- She’s learning to use scissors with righty and stabilize paper with lefty.

- She’s learning to dress and undress herself but still requires moderate assistance.

- Gabby independently uses the stairs.

- She climbs in and out of a regular twin bed.

- She loves to have her “computer time”, during which she lives on PBS and Starfall.

- Gabby feeds herself and can drink from an open cup.

- Gabby can lower pants and underwear to jump on the potty independently. Pulling them up is more difficult but she’s getting there.

- Gabby speaks in sentences but effort is required to put her thoughts into words. She especially struggles with more abstract concepts.

- Gabby has a stubborn streak. I usually appreciate this spunkiness but it can wear on me. ;)

- Gabby has been seizure-free since last surgery.(9/2009)

- Gabby thinks she owns my iPhone and is quite good at finding her favorite apps.

- Gabby gives the BEST one-armed hug around!

- She says “I Love You, sooo much Mommy” daily.

“Every good thing given and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shifting shadow.” James 1:17


  1. Hi Kelly,

    I found your blog from “Our Sweet Sophie.” I had to write because this post gave me so much hope for my daughter Charlie Claire. There is so much bad and ugly information out there on infantile spasms that it is so wonderful to come across a little girl who is doing so well!! Thank you for sharing!!

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